Pride 2012 Survival Guide
It's GAY CHRISTMAS!
Aka Pride is here in DC. JD Samson’s djing tonight, and a motley crew of amazing DJs at Booty.Rex. There’s big gay parade tomorrow, Fuse and a festival on Sunday. And that’s not even half! To help you have a great weekend we put together our very own survival guide to Capitol Pride 2012!
On surviving the WHOLE weekend:
Wear comfortable shoes. The only 18-inch stilettos I should see are the ones worn by performers entertaining at pride events this weekend. Trust me, you will not make it through one quarter of the parties if you choose fashion over function. Be smart, flats work with everything. ~ Contributor, Bianca Williams
Go Big or go home. But in order to keep going remember to hydrate and eat some food before and during pounding beers from street vendors or jello/whiskey shots from bars, that way you'll make it to the parade on Saturday AND out afterwards. ~ Editor-in-Chief, Sarah Marloff
Sunblock is your friend. As a ginger I can say from experience that red peel-y skin isn't sexy. Lather up before hitting up the parade and festival. Safe sun is sexy. ~Contributor, Hannah Everhart
Download the UBER App prior to going out- for the drunken nights when you can't find a cab, spent all of your cash, and want to impress that special someone with a black towncar pulling up JUST. FOR. YOU. Plus, as a new customer you'll save $10 off your first ride and they only charge by DISTANCE (use invite code: uberWTGG)~Contributor, Lindsay Summer
If you are a single lady, go with other single ladies. Do NOT go with that couple who’ll get in a silly fight at 11pm and make you leave the club because they're your ride and they want to go home for make-up cuddle-sex. ~Logo and t-shirt designer, Sarah Wassel
On Meeting Girls:
On second thought, don't drive. At all. Unless it's a cab. And someone else is paying for it. Other options include: getting a piggy back ride from your incredibly nice and more sober friend, sleeping in your parked car until it is safe to drive, or leaving with your new "friend" and not going home at all. ~ Sarah Wassel
The biggest parts of Pride may be this weekend, but a full week of events have already passed! And in that time,I’ve done a little anthropological-sociological study for you all. I’ve found a breed of lesbian formerly unfamiliar to me. All of those women who hibernate with their cats and wives, all of those queers who are too busy being radical to ever show up at she.rex, they now have a name. I call them OOLAPs (Only Out Lesbians At Pride). Remember that here 'out' means 'out and about'. This year, keep an eye out for the OOLAPs. Say hello to an OOLAP! Maybe ask her out! Just because they don't go to gay events year round, doesn't mean they aren't gay year round. ~Contributor, Mandy Lineweber
While this city is on the smaller scale its easy to lose that person you've had your eye on the whole weekend so I'd suggest carrying a sharpie and make sure to exchange info because you never know. Also, have a filing system. Saving her number as "girl 1" can lead to confusing situations. So be prepared because hookup opportunities can happen anytime, anywhere. ~ Bianca Williams
In our party-centric urban queer culture, older gays lack proper visibility. Daytime Pride events like the parade and the festival will pull a crowd that's more age-diverse than most lezsoirees we're used to. Seize the opportunity to talk to some older dykes: you might just get schooled in queer history, time-tested activist strategies, and the best place to get a crew cut in the city. ~Managing Editor, Christina Cauterucci
Maybe, you haven’t lived in DC for so long. Or it might be you’ve just recently started going to queer events. Whatever your reason, if you're DYING to go to Pride but don't have people to go with, I come bearing a solution. Volunteer! These massive events don't just pop up like daisies, there’s a lot of people who make them happen. Pride always needs extra hands. Very cool people volunteer, so if you are also very cool, and want to meet more of your kind, go fill out this little form. Good job! ~ Mandy Lineweber
On being Pride-tastic:
Bright colors! I often ban all serious rainbows from my surrounding area, but bright colors (read: NEON) are always encouraged. The brighter the better. And don't forget a heavy dose of glitter. ~ Sarah Marloff
Be PROUD! It is Pride after all and our time to shashay with the best of them. Take this time to truly celebrate who you are, who you love, and how you live. NOTHING is TOO GAY during Pride, nothing I say. ~Lindsay Summer
Make sure to take pictures! If you're like me, you’ve been to a lot of parades, protests, and rallies and pictures document everything like "that one year with the awkward guy following us around." ~ Hannah Everhart
If you fancy yourself too much of a class act to pull a DFMO on your average night on the town, Pride Weekend is your chance to
trash it up a bit. Public displays of affection—everything from hand-holding to thinly veiled groping—won't make Pride-goers bat a single fake, sparkly eyelash. Get to it. ~Christina Cauterucci
It's pride! Look good, feel good, wear that mini you were saving for a hot date, or those sweet kicks you don't want to scuff. Maybe it's time for that Brazilian, I don't know, but everyone wants you so work it. ~Your partner in crime and the founder of WTGG, Alexander Smith
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Heidi_merriman
Sarah is a fiction writer who moonlights as a freelance journalist. She’s been the Transgender Relationship Examiner for Examiner.com since May of 2009, and she helps keep DC classy via Meets Obsession Magazine. She can also be found at SarahMarloff.com. In the rare moments when she’s not writing she’s dancing, dying her hair, singing with her headphones on, or possibly climbing trees. She’d like to remind you all: only boring people are bored.